it’s late I’m tired, I’m working. I got to have some nice time with my wife, and then she went to sleep. I laid there for a little while to see if I could fall asleep, but nothing came. So I got up, and went into the TV room. There I hung out with my son and we play guitar for a little until he went to bed.

Something that working a put on a movie, Medicaid, that means I smoke some weed. I’m sitting there working and I have a whole bunch of screens open on my computer and I’m in the middle of doing something kind of important when I get the blue screen of death.
so I’m suffering here is the computer is fucked up. I was right in the middle of some stuff. And I have a lot of stuff open on the screens because I’m doing a lot of things at once, and they’re all gone. But really sucks because this one page I’ve been working on for like the last hour where I made all these lists, it’s gone completely.

thankfully Google Chrome will get all my windows back open again and Wordon Excel should show me my recovered documents. Then that’s a big advancement from the way things used to be.

But still I’m so pissed about this time I just put in that was all lost. I got the computer restarted Alan I just saw message that there’s updates I hope windows didn’t crash because it was updating suck not that I would know either way.

so I immediately thought to myself fuck. I need a new computer. This one kind of sucks because the screens going out, so there’s this line across the screen. I don’t even remember what I had up on the screen. Oh well, so I can sit here and suffer over how much that sucks.

but you know the reality is that it’s not that you should deal. I get so intense about my thoughts I think they’re so important. And I do have great ideas, at least I think so. But I’m a little ADD, so I have all these ideas. It’s really better for me if I can focus my attention so a lot of my ideas I don’t really need.

so I think maybe I should just buy another computer just like this one so I can just take the hard drive out of mild want to put my new one and I’ll start working again that’s a solution. And I have a little bit of money right now so I could do that. And I don’t know if I will, but I’m just sitting here experiencing the suffering over having had the experience I just had.

but I open Word back up and I can see all the documents that I had open. And they’re still in good shape, so that’s good and I do the same thing in Excel, and I can see you again the same thing. So I just have to open the documents again.

send my computers kind of back to where it was before seems to be working, and I’m afraid now that it’s going to break again and maybe this time I won’t be a little open things back up. I really just need a faster computer because I just am doing too many things at once and I need a machine that can handle it.