I just noticed that I’m angry. I can’t even tell exactly what it is an angry about, maybe it’s cause my back hurts, or maybe it’s because of this lawsuit I’m involved in that sucks. I can’t really say specifically what it is but I do know that I’m feeling anger right now

i’m about to walk into my house for my family to be happy to see me, and it’s probably going to be a gigantic mess in there. There’s going to be things to do tasks to accomplish and work to get done.

but none of that has to make me angry, I can just be okay with where I am right now. I think what’s bothering me is after sitting through this meeting that I just went through, I realized how much harder it’s going to be to get people to work on this project than I thought it was going to be. Finding a good technical person to help me is not going to be easy. And the part of me that self sabotages is immediately saying fuck it this is never going to work. I have to remember what Napoleon hill said that faith is the only known antidote to failure.

I have to remember what I’m grateful for the beautiful weather my home my family my health.

I guess I’m feeling overworked I have too much to do and I’m not staying on top of all the things I have to do. My clients aren’t asking me to do the work but I’m supposed to be doing it.